Budgeting Your Life: Part 1

Four years ago I was living in New York City counting my pennies, my calories, and the days until I moved out West to join my then boyfriend (now husband) Dave in Los Angeles.  During that time I successfully paid off over $11,000 of credit card debt, saved up nearly $15,000, purchased a car, shed roughly 60 pounds, and attained a size 2/4 depending on where I was shopping (the smallest size I had ever been, and probably ever will be, in my life).  I set goals and surpassed them.  I ran my first road race in Central Park, successfully running four miles and thinking (nearly the entire time) about the girl who couldn't run a single mile back in high school. I had a perfect stranger take my picture while I flipped off the HSBC branch at 53rd and 8th after making my final payment and becoming officially debt free.  But it wasn't easy.  It took discipline and meticulous tracking of my bank account and diet. It also helped that Dave was 3,000 miles away, I was living rent free in my Grandfather's apartment, and I had a built-in workout courtesy of my urban commute. Looking back though, that's not what I remember. What I remember was the end result - not all the hard work it took to get there.

So what happened next?  Well, I moved to Los Angeles bound and determined to keep up my intensely disciplined budgeting (both in the monetary and caloric sense).  After all, I was trading my trusty yellow Metrocard for a car (and all the associated expenses therein...you don't have to pay more when the A train breaks down...all.the.time.), and it would more important than ever to stay in shape in the land of plastic, right?  Great theory on paper, much harder in practice.  Returning to acting full-time meant returning to an non-existent unpredictable income.  Logging hours at the gym and miles on the treadmill suddenly wasn't as appealing when the love of your life calls you on your way home to say he's cooking delicious gnocchi, just popped a bottle of red, and the newest movie from Netflix arrived.   Now that's not to say we weren't watching our money or being active.  In fact, we count the abundance of local produce that made it easy to have lots of tasty but healthy recipes and the beautiful mountains for hiking as two of the things we miss most from our time in California. And it was one of those very hikes that started the downhill spiral (pun intended) of my fitness routine.  On an endorphin high from a great bootcamp workout where the trainer encouraged hiking and stretching after class to help the lactic acid drain out (given I couldn't lift my arms to put my hair in a ponytail after the arms day), Dave and I headed to our favorite hiking spot.  It was a beautiful, sunny afternoon and I was loving life.  As we descended down the back side of the trail, I was particularly struck by what an awesome day it was to be alive and started to proclaim as such.  It went a little something like this:

Me: "Isn't this just the most BEEEA-UUUU-TIFUL day? I feel SO good, I mean I just feel so healthy, and alive, and I am just so -"

The Trail: Ooooh here comes an nice unsuspecting hiker for me to give way on...let me shake myself just a bit and, yup...down she goes! Muhahahahha. Got her!

(Insert various sounds of tumbling, snapping, and screams of pain)

Me (after I stopped screaming in pain): Seriously???? No, I mean SERIOUSLY? I start talking about how life is wonderful, and then THIS?  

The rest of it was a blur of expletives intermingled with my attempts to get up and "walk it off" while Dave looked on in concern since I could barely walk.  You get the picture.  We are pretty sure I probably fractured something but thanks to the joys of not having health insurance at the time - coupled with my stubborn Irish nature - I insisted that I limp down the rest of the trail.  When I got home and took off my sneaker my ankle ballooned up and the next week consisted of icing, elevating, and anything I could try to do to heal it.  Again, looking back we are pretty sure this was not merely a bad sprain and I probably should have sought medical treatment.  But I didn't.  So an injury that should have taken six weeks to heal took six'sh or so months.  I was back up hobbling around again a week or two later but it would be a good while until I could wear something other than sneakers and an ankle brace (ya know, except for when I wore high heels to my best friend's wedding three weeks later...yeah, probably shouldn't have done that...do you ever start writing about your past and then realize some of the stupid things you have done? Sigh, perspective...).  I can honestly say this was the most painful injury I have ever had and given how long the recovery was (again, to all you medical types reading - I KNOW.  My fault, completely), I found myself pretty nervous to start running or hiking again.

Parallel to this was a deep realization of how risky it was for us to be living without health insurance.  And this of course was the key to a Pandora's box filled with all sorts of other questions about our careers, money, and the existential question of "what are we doing with our lives?" And while this was an epiphany moment of sorts, it would really take another year or so until we returned to the East coast for our respective siblings' weddings that we finally gave voice to what we knew in our hearts for so long - something needed to change.

And boy did things change.

In the past two years since moving back East to the Boston area I found an awesome job,  we got married, purchased our first home, Dave completed all his pre-reqs with a straight A average, and he got accepted to and started an amazing Nursing program - and yes, we now have health insurance.  We have been, and are, beyond blessed and have accomplished more in this short period of time than I ever dreamed possible.  BUT (and yes, there is always a but), throughout this whirlwind of change, I still remained frustrated about how to return to disciplined budgeting in a realistic way for where our lives are now, versus four years ago. So, this past year I started to change my thinking.  Using the ol' glass-half-full formula, I challenged myself to stop thinking about all the ways my "old" lifestyle in NYC seemingly allowed me to obtain all my financial and fitness goals, and how our "new" lifestyle somehow prevents us from doing the same. Instead, I started embracing how being married gives me the best coach I could hope for by my side, and how being four years wiser gives me new perspective and goals.

With that new attitude in mind, we started getting to work....  (TO BE CONTINUED)